Say It Again Look Good Feel Say It Again
Have you always looked into the mirror, saw a strange confront, and whispered to yourself, "I feel null"?
It was like you lot weren't happy or sad.
You weren't depressed or excited, and sure you weren't miserable or satisfied.
You lot just felt aught.
You expect at all the people who complain about their emotions and how miserable they are.
And you wonder what's incorrect with those people!
And you look at those who describe their emotions every bit euphoric feelings and you have no clue how that feels like.
You lot can't relate to any of these groups of people. Your emotions are kind of numb.
It's not a good to feel nil at all.
Emotions are a form of human being's vulnerability.
And this vulnerability is what helps you connect, on a deeper level, with people and yourself.
The inability to experience bad ways the inability to feel good besides.
Emotional numbness is not a approval.
In this commodity, we volition discuss what causes this emotional numbness in the get-go identify.
And and so, what nosotros can do in gild to feel something again.
What Tin can Crusade Emotional Numbness?
Of form, we can't say that all people feel nothing considering of ane reason.
Usually, a lot of reasons and variables lead to the end outcome of emotional numbness.
However, at that place are reasons which are very mutual (specially 2 reasons).
We're going to talk near these reasons in a second.
And while every case is different, those next scenarios apply to many people.
Only before we talk nearly these 2 reasons, I would similar to quickly answer an important question …
Is Information technology Borderline Personality Disorder Or Other Psychological Disorder?
It'due south a very tricky question.
And answering it incorrectly can kill any chance that you accept to feel annihilation once more.
For instance, 'feelings of emptiness' is i of the symptoms and signs of both borderline disorder and bipolar disorder also.
And usually many other symptoms of these disorders tin can match a broad range of situations.
Then, those feelings of emptiness and "I feel aught" emotions, forth with other symptoms that you are experiencing at that moment, can be plenty to diagnose yourself with such a mental disorder, correct?
Wrong!
Here'due south the thing: you should never diagnose yourself past yourself based on symptoms that yous find online.
Those two disorders, among other disorders likewise, accept a wide range of symptoms and it'due south pretty piece of cake for the boilerplate individual to notice some of these symptoms in their lives.
However, symptoms are not everything and diagnose doesn't work that way.
Existent diagnosis must be made by experts who are able to read between the lines and connect the dots objectively.
And when you say to yourself that you experience nothing because y'all have a mental disorder, it doesn't experience good.
First, you might feel helpless equally yous don't know how to treat it.
Second, you might feel similar at that place's something wrong with you and that you are 'unfixable'.
That said, let's look at how emotional numbness can happen.
Avoidance Strategy: I Feel Nil Because It Hurts To Feel Something
It'south similar going through a traumatic feel and equally a result, your heed shuts off the feelings.
And it may sound like a good strategy to handle the bad emotions.
Only every bit Brene Brown mentions in her book, Daring Greatly, you tin't selectively numb emotions.
When yous numb the bad you also numb the skillful.
This can happen early on in your babyhood after an intense experience.
Your brain felt also much hurting. And it saw that the best way to prevent this from happening again was to shut downwards and make you feel naught.
Or it tin happen subsequently an intense experience in your life. A breakup, a loss of loved one, a large failure/rejection or fifty-fifty a very stressful period in your life.
So many people say that emotional sensitivity tin can be the reason that you feel zip at all.
It's like going from an extreme to another farthermost later on getting hurt.
From beingness sensitive to feeling nothing at all considering being sensitive had hurt yous.
It's like treating everybody nicely and getting injure or rejected. So, you start treating everybody in a bad way then that yous don't get hurt or rejected again.
No one wants to get hurt again. No one wants to be in pain again.
It'southward better to exist a common cold bastard than a person who gets hurt every at present then. At least that's how your listen sees it.
Of grade, that is not true but it works somehow in keeping y'all away from getting injure (and likewise from feeling skillful).
Jim Rohn in one case said, "The walls that proceed abroad the disappointment as well keep away happiness."
To elaborate on this bespeak, y'all tin can Brene Brown'due south volume Daring Greatly. It goes deeper on concepts such equally shame and vulnerability.
Conditioning
When you experience a sure emotion for a long period of time, it tin can become your norm.
For example, depression and anxiety can become the norm to someone if this person feels depressed nigh of the time.
It's like getting adapted to this level of anarchy that information technology becomes your norm.
And it may sound like a brilliant idea to get used to pain and hurt to the point of not being fazed by them anymore.
Only in reality, it is however the aforementioned sad story.
It'due south even worse because you settle and decide to stay in the anarchy and give upwardly.
Only this strategy can't piece of work on its own.
There is no switch to plow feelings on and off. You have to proactively pace in and numb your emotions by yourself.
Nosotros do that using different means. Annihilation from distraction to bodily addictions.
The more extreme the ways, the number it will leave us.
I would like to expand on this betoken and talk near i of the dangerous means nosotros use to numb our emotions …
Arousal Addiction: When You Screw Upwardly Your Dopamine Organisation
This might surprise many of you, only it is something that we need to think seriously about.
When I say the word "addiction", I'yard not simply talking about drugs or alcohol.
I'm talking about annihilation that tin mess up your dopamine system.
I'one thousand talking about anything that nosotros utilise in an try to numb our emotions and feelings.
Right here I want to talk about arousal habit specifically.
Arousal Addiction is a little chip different than the normal addiction.
And this difference is what screws us up fifty-fifty more.
It all can be boiled down to:
- Arousal addiction is not almost getting more of the addictive substance. It's nearly novelty and getting exposed to unlike dopamine-inducing sources.
- Besides much dopamine is released. Why?
- Because novelty is not a trouble. Nosotros accept entire industries and businesses competing on providing novel content. And this content is 1 touch/click away thanks to technology.
- The end issue is easy access to behaviors that fuck upwardly how we feel.
Permit me explain.
When you release insane amounts of dopamine, you will surely experience good …
… for a while!
Subsequently that, normal activities will not produce the same amount of dopamine and will, therefore, experience dull and empty.
Dr. Philip Zimbardo, who initially raised this issue, said that it is well-nigh being addicted to things like watching porn, gaming, and also internet to the point of indulging in these activities excessively.
Retrieve of someone who watches porn 3 hours every solar day, plays video games 5 hours each 24-hour interval and spends the rest of the day browsing Facebook, Reddit, and YouTube. And apparently he has no social skills or social life.
That's arousal addiction at its all-time.
While that can be an extreme instance, withal the concept is the same.
These behaviors over-stimulate dopamine and that tin lead to missed upwardly emotions.
And this is the whole point.
When dopamine is over-stimulated, your dopamine receptors will go desensitized because at that place is so much pressure on them.
That is, they will get shut down because this dopamine is more they tin handle.
Therefore, they will not respond unless to activities that produce insanely huge amounts of dopamine.
Everything else will become tedious and emotionless.
Now, what if it was extremely piece of cake to over-stimulate dopamine?
Wouldn't it exist a disaster?
Unfortunately, it is easy.
We are living in what I like to phone call, "a dopamine-oriented gild."
Non only porn and gaming.
The limitless ringlet down on social media sites and video sites. The constant engagement with messaging apps and the distracting notifications. Online (or offline) shopping.
(Note: if you are a male person, or a female person who cares about her mate/blood brother/son, then I recommend Dr. Zimbardo's book Man, Interrupted: Why Young Men are Struggling & What We Tin Do Most Information technology. Information technology explains what is causing this demise, the reasons, and offers some solutions. And yep, I practice believe that men are more than decumbent to this issues. And that doesn't mean women are not!)
In brief, engineering science.
Through technology, nosotros can take unlimited, easy access to materials which can over-stimulate and corruption our healthy dopamine production.
When we admission these materials and get those dopamine surges, we distract ourselves and numb our emotions.
And seriously, we ordinarily binge on these things when nosotros are pitiful or disappointed.
Only pay attention how much scrolling you practice when you are down, or bored, or stressed out, or depressed!
But sadly, the medium is addictive.
Nosotros come back once more and once again to get those dopamine surges.
Nosotros get them easily and nosotros become to numb the heavy feelings.
Nosotros get deep as novelty is never a trouble in today'due south earth.
In the end, we will reach the signal where we are numb and sad.
And we will attempt to numb this sadness by going deeper.
We volition succeed. Only then there volition be more sadness.
Nosotros will again try to numb it and coffin it.
A drug aficionado needs more drug,but nosotros simply demand novel/dissimilar junk. And there's no shortage of that.
And the cycle is repeated.
Non only is choosing to numb emotions a bad conclusion, just also we have devilish methods to numb and shut them downwards.
So, when you lot hear "numbing emotions", don't assume it's simply nearly swallowing bills or junking your arms. Information technology can be very subtle and it can go nether your radar.
And then, How To First Feeling Again?
Yous don't want to spend the balance of your life similar a robot.
Information technology'southward better to feel hurting than to feel aught at all.
This hurting will assist you grow somehow.
This pain is a proof that you're a human.
Y'all're still a human and you can experience emotions. And they tin make sense ofttimes them instead of being paralyzed past them.
Figure out what you're afraid of. It might exist unpleasant to admit, simply it is important to give information technology a name.
In cursory, drop this defence mechanism of not wanting to always get injure.
Vulnerability is about risking being injure, rejected, or risking failing.
It might not feel good, merely it's essential if you want to be your truthful self and connect with yourself and with the world around you authentically.
And, please, requite your dopamine system a suspension and let it recover.
Learn more than about arousal addiction.
Stop these addictive behaviors that can numb y'all.
Indulging in these behaviors excessively will hurt y'all as much as drugs can injure a junkie. Mayhap non correct away, just eventually the damage will be done.
And the damage is already being done if you have read this commodity and some parts of information technology resonated with you.
I've said it twice and I'll say it again and once more: "The walls that are keeping abroad the disappointment as well continue away happiness." ~Jim Rohn.
Source: https://worthyinside.com/i-feel-nothing/